


love language

by shuanime



Category: SEVENTEEN (Band)
Genre: Fluff, M/M, Romance, Stargazing, Tooth-Rotting Fluff, but it's vague and quiet and, idk i like this so much tho, it's just really fluffy okay, joshua and jeonghan soulmates wbk, kind of, rated teens and up because jeonghan language is not a joke
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-29
Updated: 2020-12-29
Packaged: 2021-03-10 23:21:27
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,384
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28405428
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/shuanime/pseuds/shuanime
Summary: There's something so beautiful in knowing without it even being said.
Relationships: Hong Jisoo | Joshua & Yoon Jeonghan, Hong Jisoo | Joshua/Yoon Jeonghan
Comments: 17
Kudos: 103





	love language

**Author's Note:**

> hello hehehehe a cute little something comeeshed by a cute little someone !!! 
> 
> jos in time for joshy day :] happy birthday joshy ♡

Jisoo isn’t good with his words.

Sure, he can tell someone they make him want to barf whenever they wear that tacky sequined dress without hurting their feelings, or he can _kindly_ tell someone their dad’s not very good-looking by complimenting their mom instead, but This doesn’t mean he can say exactly what he _means_ to say.

There’s this ball of feelings—different kinds—inside of him, and there are so many words to choose from that most of the time he just chooses to shut up and let his conscience do the talking.

And by _conscience..._ he means Yoon Jeonghan.

The ever-eloquent Yoon Jeonghan, who may come off as _shy_ at first but would eventually find a way to describe your entire life in the most _colorful_ words pulled straight from all the dictionaries including the Urban.

Yoon Jeonghan, also known as Joshua’s—

What is he to him again?

That’s precisely the question his roommate asks him when he came home from work one day, drenched in what he suspects is raspberry syrup from the cafe.

When Chan said: “There’s a movie thing Wonwoo and I are doing tonight,” the tips of his ears pinking at the mention of his boyfriend, “You can bring your boyfriend, too.”

Jisoo stares for a moment before blurting out, “My—My what?”

And Chan stares back as innocently. “Jeonghan-hyung?” He waves his hands in the air, signifying the man’s height and physique as if that will explain it for Jisoo. “The guy you always bring here? Eats all of the strawberries in the fridge?”

“Ah, no,” Jisoo shakes his head rapidly, “He’s not my boyfriend.”

Blinking steadily at Jisoo, Chan pauses for a while as that sinks in. He looks like he’s thinking too deeply about it, which, frankly, confuses Jisoo because he doesn’t remember ever _insinuating_ that they’re dating.

“You sure?” Chan asks after that lag in his awareness.

“A hundred percent,” Jisoo firmly nods. “I never said we were dating.”

“Well... I thought...” Chan mumbles uncertain. But his head whips up, his eyes widening in curiosity as a question pops into his head. “What is he to you, then?”

 _Aaand_ now we’re back to the main internal conflict.

But the odd thing about this is the fact that the question doesn’t linger as much in his head when he’s _with_ the subject.

Just like right now, when Jeonghan’s head is resting on his lap, and they’re watching a movie together, he _doesn’t_ think about it.

They couldn’t go to Chan and Wonwoo’s _movie thing_ because of clashing schedules, but Jeonghan wanted to do something with Jisoo and a _movie somethin_ g for just the both of them sounded perfect.

Jisoo thinks about _it._

About him.

But there’s something about _not_ talking about it, not carving anything in stone that makes it even more... _Special?_

Is that the word for this feeling? Jisoo isn’t sure.

Jeonghan yawns, jolting Jisoo awake from his thoughts. “This movie sucks ass.”

That wrenches out an unbelieving chuckle from Jisoo who just sits back, hand carding in even intervals through Jeonghan’s soft, brown hair.

And it’s _spooky,_ really—how he sees every moment with him as the regularity.

“You chose this one, though,” Jisoo hums as he points out one of Jeonghan’s _very_ _few_ weaknesses. “You said you didn’t want to watch _Black Mirror—”_

"—I never said I _didn’t_ want to—”

“—said you didn’t want to watch my nerd shit,” Jisoo finishes, light laughter spilling from his lips as he watches Jeonghan’s face pull into a stubborn pout. “That’s basically the same thing.”

“Well, it’s a _Sunday night,”_ Jeonghan starts, and somehow, Jisoo already knows the flow of things by heart, so he never fully expects him to finish, “I want to relax, not think about philosophical gadgets and have an existential crisis on my free time.”

But, breathtakingly, he always does.

“And _Happy Death Day_ is relaxing to you?” Jisoo asks, falling into that comfortable, light banter that feels so much like home.

 _“Yep,”_ popping his P’s, Jeonghan replies almost immediately, unable to backdown from the challenge in Jisoo’s tone, “I feel _great.”_

“You just said it sucks ass—”

“Ah, sucking asses,” he says dreamily, tearing his eyes off the movies to look up at Jisoo with a shit-eating grin that used to piss the younger off so bad but now just feels... solid—it grounds him back to reality every time he flits off some place else in his mind. “My favorite activity.”

_“Oh, shut up.”_

Jisoo doesn’t do well with sudden dirty jokes in public, so it’s a real trouble when Jeonghan feels shameless enough to crack one with company, but when they’re in private...

Well, it’s easier to _pretend_ he didn’t just feel warmth creep from his neck to the roots of his hairs.

“Let’s go see a movie,” Jeonghan says after a while in comfortable silence.

“We’re seeing one right now.”

“No, let’s go see a _good_ movie,” he pushes, “Like, in the cinema.”

Jisoo snorts, “You asking me out on a date?”

Jeonghan shrugs, head shifting on Jisoo’s thighs. “Yeah.”

“You’ll pay?”

“If I don’t forget my wallet, of course I will.”

“Liar.” Shaking his head, Jisoo can’t help the grin splitting his face. “You always forget.”

Which isn’t a big deal at all because while Jisoo pays for their “dates,” when they buy food, Jeonghan shoulders the bill. In return, Jisoo buys him groceries. In return, Jeonghan buys him clothes.

A joint bank account would be nice, Jisoo ponders.

“So, what do you say?”

Nevertheless, real life isn’t that smooth. Jisoo shakes his head, “I don’t have a nickel to spare, my good sir. I just paid my half of the rent.”

“Oh,” Jeonghan dumbly says as Jisoo thinks about how good his fingers will smell later from Jeonghan’s hair. “Let’s just go onto the roof then.”

“The landlord said we _can’t_ go to the roof—”

“Fuck the landlord, he should get a real job,” Jeonghan promptly stands up with a huff, stilling for a moment because everything around him turns black for a moment. Jisoo has been nagging him to take his iron supplements, but alas. “C’mon.”

 _Fuck the landlord,_ Jisoo replays the words in his head as Jeonghan tugs him to the door. He wonders if it’s really _that_ easy to break rules or Jeonghan’s just both the menace of society and its savior.

Even so, his face is graced with a fond smile when Jeonghan put his shoes on for him by the doorway.

“Ah! It’s so cold,” Jeonghan complains aloud, rubbing himself over his sweater. When Jisoo moves to give him more space on the makeshift... bed... nest... whatever one may call a pile of blankets and pillows smuggled from Jisoo and Chan’s unit, Jeonghan glares at him like _that’s_ offensive.

“Don’t move away. I’m leeching off your body warmth.”

“Of course, you are,” Jisoo says, dryly, cozying up in his own cardigan and draping a blanket over the two of them. “Why suggest the roof if you’re just going to get cold?”

“I’m a spontaneous man, Joshuji,” Jeonghan sighs dramatically as he flops onto their cushions. “You never know what I’m about to do next.”

“I know you’re about to yelp.”

“What lame ass comeback is that— _Ack!”_

Hand coming up to hide his smile, Jisoo giggles uncontrollably as Jeonghan clutches his thigh where Jisoo just dug his elbow in. “Not so spontaneous now, huh?”

“Violence is never the answer—didn’t mom teach you that!?”

Jisoo will never fully wrap his head around the fact that Jeonghan just calls his mom... _mom_ despite just meeting her through _Facetime_ a few weeks ago. _“You_ choose violence every day!”

“I was blessed by the planet Mars.”

“You don’t even know what _that_ means,” Jisoo sighs, settling back into the cushions, too, eyes closing as he feels the cold air make his nose numb.

“Neither do you.”

When Jisoo’s head drops, he expects the soft pillows to cradle his head—

Instead, Jeonghan’s arm is there.

It’s not something unexpected, not something to throw him off-center because Jisoo has never been as physically close with any other human being as he has with Yoon Jeonghan.

It _does,_ however, make the cold the slightest bit bearable.

For a while, silence envelops them and all they could hear are the cars from the traffic somewhere in the distance, the cold air blustering a little from time to time, and Jeonghan’s _mouth-breathing_ because he likes seeing the puffs of clouds that his breath makes when he exhales.

And in that short while, Jisoo scooches a little closer to the heat of Jeonghan’s relaxed yet hard body, cold cheek pressing against the fabric of the older’s chest just like he always would whenever they fall into this position together.

It’s nice there. Warm.

“Your birthday’s coming up,” Jeonghan mentions after some time, pulling him tighter in a one arm embrace. “Want anything?”

He asks like it’s not a big deal, and frankly...

Frankly, Jisoo is thankful for Jeonghan’s affinity for the casual, for the easy. It helps.

His birthday, as one could tell, is not an _easy_ topic for him—not when all he wants is to see his mom back home. But in truth, it’s not easy to just do that because... well, he’s a barista at a local coffee shop and plane tickets to the other face of the world isn’t worth a few thousand won.

“Nothing in particular.”

To come home. Jeonghan knows. But Jisoo figures there’s not much that needs to be said between the two of them because at the end of the day...

Jeonghan knows.

“So I can give you anything?”

Jisoo chuckles, “You can even give me nothing, like you always do.”

“Not true,” Jeonghan lets out a defensive noise. “I got you that cactus on your last birthday.”

“Yeah, and you had me watering it for _months_ before telling me it’s plastic.”

Jeonghan shrugs, rubbing his nose on top of Jisoo’s hair. “Slipped my mind.”

“What are we even doing on the roof?” Jisoo complains, and he _can_ now that he notices that his sock-clad foot is outside of the blanket, numb and freezing. “Let’s just go back to the unit, Hannie, there’s heating there.”

 _“Shhh...”_ Jeonghan puts a clumsy finger to his lips. “We’re stargazing.”

If Jisoo looks up, there’s nothing but a few stars dotting the sky. They aren’t bright or special like one would think because they still live in the city and air pollution exists in their area. They aren’t twinkling, there aren’t thousands of them visible to the eyes. The first snowfall is just around the corner. The stars won’t be showing themselves for quite some time.

Come what may, they’re beautiful.

And what’s so great about them is the fact that Jisoo doesn’t have to think of words to express how much because they’re beautiful all on their own.

“You don’t know _shit_ about constellations.”

“And _shit_ is your strongest curse word,” Jeonghan sticks his tongue out, shrugging with a frisky look on his face, “I know the _Dig Bipper.”_

Jisoo blinks. “You’re _not_ serious.”

And that right there—the way Jeonghan breaks into a mischievous laughter, the way his eyes glint in impishness in contrast with Jisoo’s soft, solemn ones...

_What is he to me again?_

And it seems like he unknowingly asked that question out loud because Jeonghan looks quite surprised by it.

“Well, at one point, I was your _very_ _best_ friend,” Jeonghan starts to answer him, looking straight at him like his life depends on it and burning Jisoo with that gaze of his, like he’s _seriously_ thinking about it, “But I will bite you if you call me your brother.”

“Violence again—”

“Please don't take this the wrong way, but,” he cuts Jisoo off, “You mean a whole lot to me.”

Oh, that’s just _unfair._

Jisoo falls speechless as Jeonghan continues, “Did that answer your question?”

It didn’t.

But, at the same time, it’s the best answer there is.

“Then please don’t take this the wrong way as well, but you mean a whole lot to me, too.”

It takes a moment for both of their words to absorb in the air, traveling through the cracks of the concrete walls like a promise seeping through their surroundings—a reminder that isn’t as _loud_ as those plain three words, but are _much_ more assuring because it envelops them in an embrace.

Vague yet intimate. An easy laugh when he finds himself crushed by everything else that’s too heavy to bear. That’s what’s Jeonghan is to him. There isn’t a word for it, not that Jisoo knows of.

But he sure does mean a _whole_ _lot._

For a while, silence envelops them and all they could hear are the cars from the traffic somewhere in the distance, the cold air blustering a little from time to time, and Jisoo’s faint humming because it helps him feel less conscious of his thoughts, less embarrassed about how he just knows the feeling but doesn’t know the right words to describe them.

“It’s really cold tonight,” is all Jisoo says, tearing away his eyes from Jeonghan’s to look at the sparse white dots in the sky.

With Jeonghan, he doesn’t have to say more.

Jeonghan shifts them both so that their foreheads are pressing together. And they stay like that until the numbing cold becomes easily ignored. And they stay like that, with their eyes closed, warm breaths blowing lightly in each other’s faces, with their bodies close and at ease, bones slack even if Jisoo knows his head is heavy on Jeonghan’s arm. And they stay like that...

And they _stay_.

Jisoo isn’t good with his words.

Sure, he can tell Jeonghan that he means a whole lot to him without overexplaining his awareness of it, or he can _subtly_ say the extent of what he would be willing to do, to _be_ for Jeonghan, but this doesn’t mean he can say exactly what he _means_ to say.

There’s this ball of feelings of different kinds inside of him, and there are so many words to choose from.

On that premise, he casts a silent plea to the meager stars above them.

For the feelings to have a language of their own.

**Author's Note:**

> something quick and soft really feels Good i feel like an angel after writing this lmao horns back on now tho 
> 
> kind of emo too because this would be my last fic posted on 2020 :] and it's a really really light one, too i feel like im FLOATING in the air.
> 
> thank you for everything! i really appreciate everyone who stood by me this year. i hope it's not too much of me to wish for the same thing for the next years to come : O
> 
> warm wishes to everyone and happy new year! happy birthday to our lovely joshua hong, too oh god im tearing up i love HIM so much so so much
> 
> anyway, if you like my writing and want to lend support, here's my kofi! ♡ [buy me a coffee](https://ao3-shuanime.carrd.co/#ko-fi) ♡  
> i greatly appreciate every kudos and comment as well : ]
> 
> accounts:  
> [curious cat](https://curiouscat.me/shuquishy)  
> [twitter](https://twitter.com/shuanime)  
> i like friends! don't be shy to reach out ^-^


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